Community Service
by MailboxCook
A couple of weeks ago the judge told me that if I was going to keep waving people into my lane on the highway and then letting them hit me that not only would I have to return all of the insurance money, but that I would have to spend some time walking dogs for blind people. This is the same guy that told me that I had to stop doing unsolicited free yard work for Norah Jones, so I took his advice with a grain of salt. Regardless, I always like new experiences so I decided to try it out.
Well, that was a huge mistake. Today was the first day I went to go get the dogs from the blind people, and here’s how that went: Right after I started walking the dog a kid threw his oatmeal onto my shoes. He ran away to get more oatmeal, but luckily his dad showed up and noticed my shoes were dirty and started shining them for me without even asking. Well, turns out that cost a lot of money. I paid him the money, but he ran out of change so I guess it cost more than normal. Coincidentally, while his dad was shining my shoes, the kid who put the oatmeal on my shoes took the dog. I don’t know where the dog is, and I don’t care.
See you on the radio,
Richard

What about the blind people?
that question has haunted me for years